As of May 12, I've tweeted 114 times. Here's my favorite of me:
Winter Travel Slogan for Panama: We put the Isthmus in Christmas. That's a freebie, Panama! YOU'RE WELCOME.
Just saw a guy throw up. He was holding a box of Ritz crackers. #reverseproductplacement
Sleeping easier now that I have closure on the Big Momma's House trilogy.
First a BYU student has sex, now Northwestern students watch sex? What's next? A Florida student listens to sex? Dangerous trend.
Breaking: Kwik-E-Mart CEO caught embezzling money into a slushee fund.
I imagine a lot of bigots are disappointed when they turn on The Amazing Race.
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