Friday, November 12, 2010

gotta know when to hold 'em, when to fold 'em, know when to walk away

Brett Favre could have left a hero, with his name at the top of the record books. He didn't. Instead he spent off-seasons getting handjobs from Peter King and sent dick pictures (from one attention whore to another.)

I wanted to go back, and dig to chronicle the Brett Favre retirement history. Luckily, he's done it so much that Time made a list and NBC Sports has a tracker.

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2006 Season

Jan. 30, 2006
"If I had to pick right now and make a decision, I'd say I'm not coming back."

The headline for that ESPN story is "Favre says he's leaning toward retirement." Amazing that this started before the 2006 season.

The Packers go 8-8.

2007 Season

"If today's my last game, I want to remember it. It's tough. I'll miss these guys. I'll miss this game."

Favre had a great season, leading the Packers to a 13-3 record. He broke Marino's record for touchdown passes and passing yards. He also beat the Chiefs, giving him the landmark of defeating all 31 opposing teams. (He also set the career interception mark.)

The Packers hosted the NFC Championship game against the Giants. Favre threw an interception in overtime that set up the Giants game-winning field goal.

2008 Season

On March 4, 2008, Favre formally announced his retirement.

Apr. 4, 2008
"I have no idea where that came from, but it certainly didn't come from me. I'm happy about my decision and I haven't once said, 'I wonder if I made the wrong decision.' I know it's the right one. It's kind of funny. Even when I'm retired, they won't let me stay retired."

-- Favre, in an interview with SI.com regarding claims that his agent is making inquiries to other teams about a trade from the Packers

July 2, 2008
"It's all rumor."
-- Favre, regarding claims that his family wants him to keep playing

Aug. 7, 2008
Favre becomes a New York Jet.

The Jets start out 8-3, but miss the playoffs finishing 9-7. Favre threw 8 picks and 2 scores in those final five games. Somewhere in there, he sent some messages.

2009 Season

Feb. 12, 2009
Despite the Jets GM insisting he wants Favre to return, Favre retires again.

May 8, 2009
Favre has a meeting with the Vikings to "tell them he's staying retired." Now I'm not so sure that they didn't have a meeting and Favre explained how he wants to play for them, but that he won't join the team until after training camp.

July 28, 2009
Childress tells everyone that Favre is staying retired.

Aug. 18, 2009
Favre becomes a Minnesota Viking.

Favre beats the Packers, becoming the only QB to defeat all 32 current franchises. Favre leads the Vikings to a 12-4 record and they reached the NFC Championship Game. His interception in the final minutes of regulation set up overtime, where the Vikings would fall to the Saints.

2010 Season

Aug. 3, 2010
Favre tells Vikings he's retiring.

Aug. 17, 2010
Favre rejoins Vikings.

Vikings are 3-5 and an injured Favre should have benched if Childress wasn't so concerned with protecting Favre's streak.

November 11, 2010
Favre says he won't return for 2011.

- - -

So there you have it. This bullshit has been going on for five years, and it's still not done. Forgive me if I'm not fawning all over this latest rumor.

But seriously, all he had to do was not sign with the Jets in 2008. He already had the record for touchdown and passing yards. He took the Packers to the NFC Championship in a great season. He would have retired and had everything in Green Bay named after him forever.

Instead he goes to New York and sends pictures of his cock, then goes to rival Minnesota, throwing more game-ending interceptions, all the while continuing to be a drama queen. Talk about a legacy.

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