Doritos Collisions: The Mystery Behind History's Greatest Doritos

I was going to write a long post about Doritos Collisions. It would have included sentences like the following: 

There have been three truly great ideas of the 21st century (to date): buying Google stock, killing Osama bin Laden, and putting two different Doritos in the same bag. 

Instead I came up with a snazzy title and am just going to post a giant image of my favorite Doritos flavor ever. They are discontinued. 

Yes, I am mailing it in. But is this any different than most articles these days? At least it's not a 10-picture slideshow.

stupid thought

It would be fun if the Tampa Bay Lightning changed their name to the Tampa Bay Destroyers. That way when you look at a playoff bracket you could have a team like NYR vs TBD.

TBA would also be funny.

I know the used to be called the Devil Rays. But I never heard anyone make that comment then.

nba finals thoughts: part 1

I don't have TV and I haven't read anything yet. There seems to be a few obvious thoughts here so I'm sure that I'll reiterate what someone else said or will say.

Good matchup.

If you're a Dallas fan, you have to be thinking about the last time Dirk & Co. got to the finals, got up 2-0, and then lost the next four games. Where Dwayne Wade got all the calls, deserved or not.

If you're a Miami fan, just kidding, I know there aren't any.

If you're a Cleveland fan, you've already blown your brains out.

So we've got a Big Two + Bosh on one side and Mark Cuban. Most interesting owner vs most interesting stars.

Either Dirk or LeBron will win their first title. I think that's nice. Always fun to see stars who have been chasing a title for years finally get one.

I made a bet with Mark before the season started that Miami would win it all. He took the field. We shook on it. We never came up with stakes and at this point it wouldn't be fair. When Miami wins, I'll probably just make a post titled Mark Blows.

Despite my prognostication, I think it would be better for the league if Dallas wins. After the Boston Big 4 title, if they Heat win it will only exacerbate the trend of stars jumping to select teams. But even if Dallas wins, the model still worked and I expect the trend to continue.

Real Mascots: NFC East

Installment #3. Finding a photographed approximation of a fictional being proved difficult, but I figured the tallest man in the world was the best I could do. Also, I researched that Washington's team name was based on a coach that claimed Sioux ancestry, so the picture represented here is a Sioux.

Real Mascots: AFC North

Back by popular demand (not really) here's installment #2.

Real Mascots: NFC North

This is the first installment of a new project. I think it would be fun to do all 32 NFL teams and possibly other sports, but finding good pictures for every team is hard. (Green Bay was almost impossible.)

top tweets

As of May 12, I've tweeted 114 times. Here's my favorite of me:


Winter Travel Slogan for Panama: We put the Isthmus in Christmas. That's a freebie, Panama! YOU'RE WELCOME.

Just saw a guy throw up. He was holding a box of Ritz crackers. #reverseproductplacement

Sleeping easier now that I have closure on the Big Momma's House trilogy.

First a BYU student has sex, now Northwestern students watch sex? What's next? A Florida student listens to sex? Dangerous trend.

Breaking: Kwik-E-Mart CEO caught embezzling money into a slushee fund.

I imagine a lot of bigots are disappointed when they turn on The Amazing Race.

100 bucks on Twice the Appeal

funniest sounding finals matchups

Since it's the NBA playoffs, I dusted off nba2k9 for ps3. And with updated rosters I've taken the new look Nuggets to the finals where they face Miami. Or in other words the matchup is Heat Nuggets. By sport here are the funniest sounding matchups that are possible, based on conferences. 

NBA
Magic Nuggets
Heat Nuggets
Thunder Bucks
Jazz Wizards

NHL
Wild Panthers
Wild Penguins
Wild Senators
Lightning Sharks
Lightning Avalanche

NFL
Browns Lions*

*not funny because of the syntax, but because the thought of these teams meeting in the Super Bowl is so laughable.

two days later

Editor's Note: I wasn't going to write anything, because who cares what I think? But this blog has never been about writing for others--I use it more than anyone to capture the time and refer back to it. And now it's very real to me that I will have children and in the near future they could ask me: what was it like? I can ask my parents how they felt when we landed on the moon or where they were when JFK was shot, but I wouldn't get more than a few sentences filtered through the passage of time. So here it is. 

- -

It is now Tuesday morning. When I found out Sunday night that the U.S. killed bin Laden, I didn't know exactly how to feel. It was good news and yet I didn't have the urge to go driving and honk my horn or gather at the White House gates or chant U-S-A at a Phillies game.

So how do I feel?

Here are two quotes from Obama: "Justice was done here." "I think we can all agree that this is a good day for America."

Obama has to word everything he says carefully, and I agree with those two statements. I'm glad that when the 10th Anniversary of September 11th rolls around, every American will be able to say, "at least we finally got him."

But instead of celebrating I feel more like someone attending a lethal injection of a mass murderer. They got what they deserved. It's over. But I take no joy in another death. It had to be done.

This quote from Brian D. McLaren hit home: "Joyfully celebrating the killing of a killer who joyfully celebrated killing carries an irony that I hope will not be lost on us."

Am I more proud to be an American today then I was last week? No. If it's possible, I am more proud of the U.S. Navy Seals. To do that mission with a mechanical problem and still have zero casualties. Simply amazing. Our unrealistic heroes on film and idealistic video game protagonists pale in comparison to real thing. And I have no problem with them celebrating--they faced a task 10 years in the making with the whole world watching the results and they did it flawlessly.

But for me...I have not sung any songs or chanted in the street. This is justice by death, not a party.

was there an nfl draft this weekend?

I seem to remember something about a wedding and then something else happened...

Anyways, here is the only site you need to see for draft grades. You won't believe what team finished first.

HOW TO: make homemade pretzels

BREAKING: Over the weekend I learned that it's possible to make giant soft pretzels at home. So I did.

They turned out awesome. This is the recipe I used. I saved a screenshot below in case that site ever goes down.

I don't have much experience with making dough/bread. In fall 2009 I made an unsuccessful beer bread and an unsuccessful pizza crust. 

I followed the directions exactly. I learned that my hand-mixer has dough hooks and used them for the first time. The dough rises for an hour and it was fun to roll and twist.

Though Brit and I differed on our methods. In the top picture, I made the top-left, a simple overlap. Brit made the lower-left, adding a twist before the overlap.

At one point I added more baking soda to the boiling bath and it overflowed big time. It happens.

I baked them on aluminum foil and generous cooking spray on the foil is essential. And I only needed one egg to make egg wash for 8 pretzels. I only had fine salt. I feel like thicker pretzel salt would have been nice.

They turned out better than expected. I'm pretty sure the pretzel-flavor comes from the baking soda bath, and I loved the bites that were bursting with the pretzelness.

Wish I had a great cheese sauce to go with them. I tried them with deli mustard and cinnamon sugar and both were good. I baked one of them with a shredded cheese topping at the end, but it didn't hit the cheese sauce mark.

I'm convinced these would make excellent pretzel buns for big burgers. And these would be a huge hit at a Super Bowl party.

meta: first redesign in 4 years

Last year I made HC wider.

In 2007, I had my last significant redesign.

This only came because I wanted to switch to the new Blogger Template Designer. I've also discovered Blogger's new post editor which includes better settings for uploading photos and using Google's web fonts.

2007-2011

2011-present

Osama hamper dump

from wiki

guy in Abbottabad unknowingly live-tweets the raid

Obama not giving anything away laughing at Seth Meyer's bin Laden joke

ABC video of kill site

the answer to where was he all this time

conventional wisdom of reddit from 20 days ago, that bin Laden died in 2002