Hater's Guide to the Playoffs

The title isn't really accurate. Only if you realize that I am the hater. 

Now you might think, fresh off a dynasty where you promised you could never complain about sports, surely you're not going to be petty and revel in the failure of others. 

1. This isn't complaining. 

2. No, I'm not better than this.

3. Don't call me Shirley. 

Let's see how are the AFC superstars taking advantage of the Chiefs first down year of the Mahomes era?

Justin Herbert 0-3 in the playoffs. What is he training with Lamar in the offseason? Herbert is 27. Derek Carr was 30 when he said questioning if he can win a playoff game is ridiculous. He never did. Just saying. 

Okay so, I actually have to stop my flow here and go on a deep dive on this. 

- - -

I spent for fucking ever trying to find the HC post with Derek Carr and ridiculous. I finally did. The reason it took so long was it was originally on twitter. But I did post the twitter screenshot to Hoagie Central in November 2022. 

Let's lay out the timeline. 

Carr goes to his first playoff game in January 2022. He loses. 

In April 2022, there's a story where Carr responds to his critics. Here's the headline: Derek Carr: Questioning if I can win a playoff game is ridiculous.

When the story breaks, I post on twitter:

Here is the Reddit NFL post at the time.

And then in May 2025 Carr retires, with a playoff record of 0-1. So I would just like to read all those reddit comments saying that he has plenty of time and the debate is stupid and say they were objectively wrong. 

Anways, back to the flow.

_ _ _

When Jim Harbaugh isn't stealing signs it's a lot harder to win championships. Maybe Brady should hire him to coach the Raiders. 

I guess this is why Justin Herbert is Justin Spreadsheet or Justin Sherbert (not as good as ice cream.)

Let's see who else can take advantage of this opportunity to play in the playoffs without Mahomes?

AFC North? Lamar? Burrow? Bueller? Nobody here either huh.

And let's go down to Duval County to check in on wunderkind Liam Cohen turning around the Jags. Congrats on the 13-4 season and it's gone. Turns out TrevorBank is just as reliable as South Park Bank.

Stay tuned next week where I get to celebrate the Broncos getting bounced in their first game or Josh Allen flaming out before the AFC Title Game. Either way I'm a winner!